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Lights, camera, action!!

For the twelfth year in a row, the Chicago Shidduch Group hosted its Summer Community Event for Chicagoland and beyond on Sunday, July 16th.

It was "standing room only" at the home of Kreina Staal, hostess and MC for the gala evening, which began with an inspirational Dvar Torah given by Rebbetzin Chanie Hertz of Chicago's Congregation Bnei Ruven.

Launched as a shidduch support group for moms of singles, the Chicago Shidduch Group has become the prototype for similar Shidduch Groups in over 50 locations worldwide which comprise the International Shidduch Group Network.

Members come together on a regular basis to learn and follow the Rebbe's directives for shidduchim, marriage and shalom bayis; be informed on shidduch resources such as matchmakers, Jewish dating websites and networking opportunities;  and to help one another with celebrating the eventual  simchas resulting from their efforts.   Group members are encouraged to give at least 18 cents per day to Hachnossas Kallah--per the Rebbe's directive-- and to daven for each other's children and the singles in their communities.

Present at the event were over 60 women of all ages and stages in the community, from 20-something singles to mothers of singles as well as single women 40 plus.  Attendees came from as far away as Mequon, Wisconsin, to learn and be inspired.
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Keynote speaker for the event was Shandel Malka Blasberg, experienced and internationally renowned shadchan from Crown Heights, who addressed the topic, "Taking the Stress Out of the Search!"  She gave an overview of the Torah blueprint for getting to the chuppah, focusing on the wisdom of the Torah directive to utilize a shadchan in the process.  "As we see from Avraham sending Eliezer as his shaliach to find a wife for Yitzchak, an intermediary is needed to act as the go-between for the two parties involved in the shidduch, at the very least to get things off the ground!"  Mrs. Blasberg spoke about the  roles of the parents and the singles themselves in the process, illustrating her points with  fascinating stories and examples of many matches she has been involved in.

A highlight of the evening was a unique hands-on lecture/demonstration given by gourmet organic chocolatier Dan Bieser of Tabal Chocolate Company of Milwaukee.

A bean-to-bar company, Dan showed photos of his travels to South America to procure cacao beans from the growers, whom he personally knows.  He explained the whole process, from start to finish,  of how the beans are then used to make his chocolate bars, cocoa and ice cream.  

Guests at the event reveled in tasting samples of the many-flavored chocolates:  espresso crunch, sea salt, coffee, almonds, cherries, pepper, teahouse matcha, masala chai, peppermint rooibos, and more.

Refreshments for the evening featured an exquisite milchig charcuterie board, including gourmet cheeses, dried and fresh fruits, nuts, chocolate, breadsticks and more, prepared by the food committee headed by Rochel Bukiet, Tzirel Grossman and Rivkah Kaplan.

To cap the evening off, an array of spectacular prizes were raffled off, including jewelry, gift certificates to a restaurant and a salon , as well as a free profile creation and analysis by local shidduch coach and shadchan Rabbi Moishe Raitman.

"We feel blessed to have been a prime resource to our many members and supporters here and around the world," stated Elana Bergovoy, co-founder of the Chicago Shidduch Group and President of the International Shidduch Group Network.  "Since we began our Group twelve years ago, several  hundred singles have gotten married, either directly or indirectly through the auspices of our Network.  We've hosted international conferences and profile-sharing on global teleconferences."  She urged members to take advantage of the latest feature of the Network:  a dating website for Chabad and Chabad-friendly singles, called Find Your Bashert (www.findyourbashert.com) based on the very successful model of the Saw You at Sinai dating website.

Kudos to the collaborative efforts of Kreina Staal,Chanie Hertz,  Rochel Bukiet, Tzirel Grossman, Miriam Leah Yarmove, Esther Rena Grossman,  Rivkah Kaplan, Esther Raitman, Rivkah Benhiyoun and Elana Bergovoy for a memorable event!  For more information on the Shidduch Group Network, please visit 
​International Shidduch Group Network or write chicagoshidduchgroup@gmail.com. 

​On Monday, June 20th, matchmakers from Brooklyn, Pittsburgh and the midwest trekked to Rabbinical College of America in Morristown for the first FindYourBashert Meet the Shadchan event.  Founders of the International Shidduch Group Network, Dvora Schulman and Elana Bergovoy worked with Rabbi Yaakov Wagner, to arrange for bachurim in the parsha of shidduchim to meet with FindYourBashert shadchanim and become part of the growing global Lubavitch shidduch database. 
 
Bachurim who pre-registered were able to meet with multiple shadchanim. Shadchanim had the opportunity to meet the bachurim face-to-face, understand their needs and what they are looking for, and ensure more frequent and accurate suggestions/matches. FindYourBashert offers a larger and more diverse selection of profiles for matching than a single matchmaker would have.  Immediately suggestions were flying.
 
Computers were available onsite and prior to meeting with shadchanim, bachurim completed the online questionnaire and became members of FindYourBashert.  Since January 2014, the International Shidduch Group Network, a 501(C)3 nonprofit organization, has celebrated over 100 shidduchim. “We all began to realize that a database was required to manage the volume of profiles,” explained Schulman.  “We faced the reality that without embracing technology we would not be able to achieve our mission of making shidduchim for every single in every corner of the planet where Lubavitchers now dwell.”
 
“But we were not willing to sacrifice privacy and the wisdom of a personal matchmaker,” added Elana Bergovoy.   FindYourBashert assists shadchanim with the traditional searching process, suggests matches for shadchanim to review, and provides tools to make the entire process more efficient.  Singles express that FindYourBashert eliminates a lot of the embarrassment because only shadchanim can search the database and profiles are not emailed to large groups that go viral. 
 
The Shidduch Group Network has fused the traditional shidduch process with technology in a professional and personal system customized for Lubavitchers using only Lubavitch shadchanim (and un-shadchanim).  Singles have nothing to lose and everything to gain by signing up now!  Basic membership is free and includes entering your profile into the FindYourBashert worldwide database and up to two suggestions per week.  Gold membership includes two personal matchmakers, who will regularly search the database for matches for you, one-on-one phone interviews, up to ten suggestions per week, the ability to accept suggestions, priority listing for increased exposure, and featured listing to all matchmakers, for as little as $12.95/mo.  Upon a successful match, shadchanus gelt shall be paid to the shadchan.
 
The Morristown Meet the Shadchan event was such a success, that another is planned surrounding Gimmel Tamuz, July 10th in Crown Heights at Machon Chana Women’s Yeshiva, 825 Eastern Parkway--under the auspices of the NCFJE.
Females will meet shadchanim  from 10 AM – Noon and males will meet shadchanim from 1 to 4PM in the afternoon.  Pre-Register to secure your appointment!
 
To register for the event, please send an email with your first and last name, telephone number and your FindYourBashert user name (if already a member) to:
 
MeetTheMatchmaker@FindYourBashert.com
 
Submit your profile in advance and become a member at:  www.FindYourBashert.com
 
We look forward to meeting you!
 
 
 
 
 

​Toronto Shidduch Group met on 11 Teves/December 22 at the home of Rachel Wasserman.

​The group members decorated beautiful drinking cups for their daughters to use at their Chassunahs!!

The Beitar Shidduch Group had a Chanukah meeting at the home of Sara-Ester Varnai this week on December 6. Around twenty ladies came, with some attendees traveling from Yerushalyim and Ramat Bet Shemesh.
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The Chicago Shidduch Group held their annual Chanukah Melave Malka this past Saturday, December 5, at the home of Aryeh Leib and Rachelle Benjamin. Many Chicago families were represented at the event, which boasted the best turnout since the Shidduch Group began this tradition.

Rabbi Shea Hecht addressed the attendees, speaking honestly on topics not often discussed. He was introduced by Levi Bukiet with a Rebbe story. Local shadchan Rabbi Moishe Raitman gave a Dvar Torah and organized a MadLibs word game. Yale Zimmerman provided musical accompaniment on the piano, playing beautiful niggunim as people arrived. 

YASAHAR KOACH TO EVERYONE WHO WORKED TOGETHER TO HELP MAKE A MEMORABLE EVENT, especially to Rachelle, Menucha and Rochel.

A freilichen Chanukah to all--chag sameach mamash!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Melbourne, Monsey, Ottawa, Montreal, Bal Harbor, Sunny Isles Beach, Worcester, Pittsburgh, Chicago, Ann Arbor, Atlanta, Kensington and of course, Crown Heights.

From these locations and more, came 40 delegates to our International Shidduch Group Network Shabbaton this past weekend, Cheshvan 10-12/October 23-25, Parshas Lech Lecha.

The V.I.P. Invitation Only Shabbaton took place in Crown Heights to unite Chapter leaders and shadchanim and strengthen their resolve to work together to enable our singles to get to the chuppah, incorporating the directives of the Rebbe.

Together, they learned, farbrenged, and networked, inspired by guest speakers, hosts and hostesses.  Friendships were renewed and strengthened, infusing all with a feeling of empowerment as we strive to help one another, friends and neighbors to make shidduchim.

The weekend kicked-off with a royal catered Shabbos dinner at the home of Choula and Leibish Nash.  Rabbi Nash gave a dvar Torah, and regaled us with a story of the legendary shadchan Shimshon Stock who made many matches in Crown Heights a few decades ago.  Sara Tova Best spoke about the power of Hakhel Year.  "According to the Rebbe, by taking advantage of every opportunity to make Hakhel gatherings, we can 'upgrade' from Golus to Geula," she told us.  

Rebbetzin Toby Leider, of Melbourne, inspired us with stories.  The most poignant gave over an experience from many years ago that occurred at a Kinus haShluchos convention.  At a farbrengen at 2 am, women were asking for brachos for whatever they needed, to which everyone answered “Amen.” One pregnant woman turned to her family on either side of her and confided that her doctor had forewarned her that tests revealed she was carrying a Down's Syndrome baby. She asked that they ask for a bracha to give her the strength and wisdom to raise this child. Instead they asked for a bracha that she would give birth to a healthy baby – to which 600 women answered, “Amen!” Several months later, the woman gave birth and right afterwards she asked her doctor, "Please tell me, “How am I to take care of this child?"  To which the doctor replied, "I don't know what you mean--you just gave birth to a PERFECTLY HEALTHY BABY."

Toby led our whole group in giving brachos to one another enthusiastically—for refuahs and yeshuas and for shidduchim for the singles in our lives. Tears were flowing as hearts opened in shared requests. It was a magical experience that surely will be remembered by all who were there. We hope that those heartfelt requests will be speedily answered, in the merit of our achdus and ahavas Yisroel!

Ayala Moshiach (and family) were our gracious hosts for a gourmet Shabbos lunch.  Ayala leads a large Shidduch Group in Crown Heights for mostly Hebrew-speaking ladies.  They meet every Tuesday night, learn many inyanim of the Rebbe regarding shidduchim, and give regularly as a group to Hachnossas Kallah.

Our Shabbaton reconvened for the afternoon session at the home of Shaindy Gutnick.  Dr. Elka Pinson--therapist, shidduch coach, and shadchan--gave a seminar on "Shidduchim:  Past, Present and Future," openly dealing with several pertinent issues in shidduchim.  Sara Tova Best, a personal coach and EFT therapist, spoke about how to get successfully"unstuck" in relationships, especially singles who seem to be "blocked" reaching their goal of getting married.

Motzei Shabbos we were feted with a delectable Melave Malka meal, prepared by Mindy Lokeinsky and Raizy Brownstein, at Rayim Ahuvim shul. Thanks go to Chapter Leader Chavi Katzman, whose husband is the Shul gabbai, for hosting. The program for the evening was musical entertainment by singer Rivkah Eilfort, followed by a "Q & A: Ask the Shadchan" panel discussion. Moderator Leah Bergovoy interviewed the panel of experienced shadchanim, consisting of Chana Miriam Hubener, Toby Lieder, Fayge Rapp and Shandel Malka Blasberg.  

"Let's Make Matches!"  The Grand Finale

The Shabbaton concluded at the home of Sharona Sternbach on Sunday morning, with a delicious brunch, sponsored by Tamar Stone's Crown Heights Shidduch Group. Shoshana Lerner of "Chabad Shidduch" fame led a grand networking/profile-sharing session. Shoshana hosts a monthly Chabad Profile Sharing Meeting at Chabad of Midwood which attracts participants from the tri-state area.  Her knack for efficiently leading a roundtable networking session, interspersed with a sprinkling of shidduch jokes, has led to many matches being made. Our event was no exception!  Names were "flying" around the table as participants put on their "shidduch antennae" and compared notes to suggest shidduchim to one another.  We understand "from the grapevine" that shidduch dating resulting from this session is already underway!

By the time 1 PM came and the Shabbaton came to a close, every delegate left feeling inspired and empowered, ready to reconnect with her local Shidduch Group and get back to the work of learning the Rebbe's directives for shidduchim and putting them into practice; networking locally and internationally with ISGN members to make matches; davening for one another, and much more.​

At the conclusion of the Shabbaton, International Shidduch Group Network President Elana Bergovoy made a plea to the group for tax-deductible donations to be made to the Network, a 501(C) 3 non-profit organization.  "Please help us to help you," she said.  "We can only continue this important work with your help."  

For more information, please go to shidduchgroupnetwork.com/donate.

The Chicago Shidduch Group celebrated their 10th anniversary with the first annual Simcha Expo showcasing local vendors and featuring guest speaker Mrs. Miryam Swerdlov.

by Alisa Ungar-Sargon
Photos: Deja Views, Leah Boyarskiy

The Chicago Shidduch Group celebrated their tenth anniversary with the first annual Simcha Expo on Sunday, August 23rd. The Expo showcased over twenty local vendors, who all donated gift certificates to a raffle for attendees. After the vendors' fair, the program included a lineup of speakers from the Shidduch Group, the presentation of the Founder's Award to the organization president, Elana Bergovoy, and guest speaker Miryam Swerdlov.

The Expo took place in the cool hall of Congregation B'nei Ruven in Rogers Park. Among the high ceilings and exposed brick, attendees enjoyed refreshments and presentations from local vendors suitable for religious simchas. 

Each vendor also donated a $100 gift certificate for the raffle. In attendance were Deja Views Photography, Sanela B Salon, Illinois Nut & Candy, Eliana's Custom Creations, Honey's Bunch Florist, and Chaya Wolf Set for Life Invitations, among others. 

The Shidduch Group is the Chicago chapter of the International Shidduch Group Network. A nonprofit organization that aims to connect people across the globe, members follow the Lubavitcher Rebbe's teachings to help make matches for themselves, their children, and each other's children. 

“It's very important to belong to a group like this,” says Menucha Gershon, an active member of the Chicago Shidduch Group. “The women support each other, and give advice, and help. It's an important thing because [matchmaking is] not an easy process and we like to be there for each other.” The Network's message is that by learning Torah together, davening for each other's children, networking and celebrating together, its members are able to draw down the mazal through the power of connection, sisterhood and Torah. 

The Expo attracted more than just Shidduch Group Network affiliates. “I'm a community member,” says Shoshana Schnair. “I read the publicity, it sounded like a wonderful idea, and I just would like to be part of a group that would help all the young people find their right zivug.” 

The Shidduch Group Network began in Chicago ten years ago and has since spread to six continents with over forty-five active Chapters, offering educational programs, conferences, publications and training for matchmakers. Since 2014, the Network has been involved in over a hundred successful shidduchim.

The second portion of the night featured Mrs. Swerdlov's speech entitled: “Six Steps from Stress to Serenity.” As a tour guide on international trips, head of a teenage summer camp, mother and community member, Mrs. Swerdlov has a rich offering of personal experiences that she shares with her audience to ease the strong mussar [instruction on self-improvement] she imparts.

Mrs. Swerdlov spoke conversationally with comedic interjections. With the aid of a handout, she listed the six qualities that allow a person to trust in Hashem while simultaneously working to improve herself: Faith, Truth, Courage, Responsibility, Self Love and Unity. 

“This is my adage,” Mrs. Swerdlov proclaimed. “Live every day to the fullest. Every single day to the fullest. Do not allow a twenty-four hour period to go by without knowing … what you accomplished that day.” 

Her main messages related to having faith in Hashem and believing in his utter control over the world: “If you really believe that the reason something is happening is because that's what Hashem decided, it has nothing to do with you. He is in charge.” This theme of emunah [faith] continued throughout the night with other speakers referring to it as the best course of action a person can take when waiting for a shidduch: to believe that Hashem is the only one who can truly affect change. 

Members of the Chicago Shidduch Group presented the Founder's Award to Mrs. Bergovoy, a tambourine inscribed with the bracha [blessing] from under the chuppah [marriage canopy]. “It's ten years since Elana Bergovoy started this grassroots group of women,” says member Tziril Grossman, when asked why the Shidduch Group decided to present the Founder's Award this year. “She felt there was something missing in the community and that women needed to get together. When women connect with each other, magic happens. And it's all due to Elana.”

Mrs. Bergovoy thanked the organizers, donators, vendors, family and especially Dvora Schulman, vice president of the International Shidduch Group Network, for their efforts in supporting the Network. She also told Rabbi Nachman's story about the Jew who dreamed of a treasure and set out to find it, only to discover the treasure had been buried on his own property all along.

Mrs. Schulman spoke as well, offering details about the history of the Network and how it became the thriving enterprise it is today. She shared her personal success story about how she presented her daughter's profile on one of the Network's conference calls and a shadchanit was then able to make her match. “I know this shidduch was a gift from Hashem,” said Mrs. Schulman, “but I am hooked. Despite my full time job and my family, the Shidduch Group Network is my shlichus [higher purpose]. There's no work more difficult, nor more certain, of bringing the geulah.”

Like Mrs. Schulman, another attendee attributes her son's engagement to her involvement in the Chicago Shidduch Group – maybe. “Elana Bergovoy had some sort of event that she was doing and so she asked me to host it in my house,” says Rachelle Benjamin. “I'm a foodie, so I did a food demonstration and it was a really beautiful event ... Shortly after that my son got engaged! So it was like, wait a second, hey – was there a correlation between making this cooking show for the Chicago Shidduch Group?” Mrs. Benjamin assisted with the planning of the Simcha Expo, contributing to organizing the vendors and the ambition of the event.

The evening was emceed by Kreina Staal, who led the audience in a recitation of the Rebbe's kapitel (Psalm 114). Clara Chaya Epstein then sang two a cappella songs, inviting the audience to participate by giving a beat. “This Shidduch organization I think is an amazing concept,” said Mrs. Epstein. “It started with a few people in a living room and it became this impactful, amazing thing that just went and touched thousands.” 

The International Shidduch Group Network has big plans for the future: “Last year, we became a 501(C)(3) tax exempt organization,” Mrs. Schulman said in closing. “We now have over forty Chapters around the globe. We've had two international conferences in Crown Heights, and dozens and dozens of teleconferences. We published our first book … Be'ezrat Hashem, with your help, we will see the creation of a shidduch office one day, we will have better technology to connect us globally, and worldwide events to bring us together more often. Because by connecting to one another with simcha [happiness] and Ahavat Yisrael [love of your fellow Jew], we will make more shidduchim and we will bring the geulah [Mashiach].” 

Smadar Strauss, left, hosted the Chicago Shidduch Group in her beautiful garden for a networking meeting in honor of Tu B 'Av. Elana Bergovoy, right, and others learned how to make delicious sushi and also enjoyed fresh fruit salad "al fresco." 
Fraida Nathan, LCSW, CADC, ICDVP, was the featured speaker on the topic: "Emotionally Intelligent Marriage: Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work" (based on John Gottman's groundbreaking research).

Twenty-five women turned out at the Bortunks' home in Miami Beach last night, July 21,
for a meeting hosted by Shayna Bortunk and Toby Weic. After a Dvar Torah from Rabbi Mendy Bergovoy, a profile-sharing session took place.  

Rabbi Mendy, the "Shidduch Rabbi," also shared news of the upcoming Mega Shidduch Event, a Singles Mixer, to take place at The Shul of Bal Harbor on Tu B'Av, July 30. For more info and to register, please go to our Events Page on this site!

This successful event happened Monday night in LA! Floral Centerpieces were created & then given to the latest simcha happening in the LA group, the chassunah of Miriam Feiner's daughter, Bracha.

Money from the event was donated to the local Gemach for simcha centerpieces. Yashar koach to Debbie Fine and the ladies of the LA Shidduch Group for another successful program. May we hear good news from LA very soon!

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With sadness we regret to inform all of our friends in the Shidduch Group Network worldwide of a terrible tragedy.

Our dear friend, Fayge Rapp of Crown Heights--shadchan and leader of a large Shudduch Group--has lost her dear husband, Rabbi Yekutiel Rapp, 66, in a tragic car accident. He was run over and killed this afternoon right in front  of his apartment building on Empire Blvd.

Rabbi Rapp was a spirited activist and long-time educator, a true Lubavitcher Chosid in every sense of the word.

We extend condolences to Fayge and her family. Our wish for them is that they be comforted amongst the mourners of Zion and be reunited immediately with Kuti with the revelation of Moshiach immediately.

Baruch Dayan HaEmes .

Dvora & Elana