How many dates are over before they even start? The bochur or girl hesitate to “open up” 

because they don’t know where it’s all heading. They would rather wait for the 5th or 6th 

date before sharing any personal information or thoughts. Problem is, they may not get to 

the 2nd or 3rd date let alone the 5th or 6th date; which is so often the case.

There seems to be a misunderstanding as to what “opening up” is. “Opening up” does not mean sharing personal , private, sensitive information. “Opening up” means being conversational, show genuine interest, be engaging, share thoughts that are neutral and not intruding , and discuss generic topics of interest. “Personal information” does not need to be discussed unless you feel comfortable doing so and feel there is serious potential for marriage with the one whom you are dating.

Treat each date as if it’s the last. Give it all you’ve got. There may not be a second chance!!

I often hear if one is dating someone of Sephardic descent, that they needn’t test with Dor Yesharim. Recently I attended a workshop with Dr. Zev Zlatopolsky, M.A., Director of the Dept. of Pre-Implantation Genetics at the Reproductive Genetics Institute, Chicago, who is consulted daily by Rabbonim, Shadchanim and individuals worldwide, who debunked this notion and strongly encouraged a Dor Yesharim test for all individuals regardless of being Sephardi or Ashkenazi. He offered a number of reasons; the two main ones being:
[a] No one knows for sure if in their Sephardic ancestry there was no marriage with an 
 Ashkenazic person. Therefore an Ashkenazic gene could be present and therefore would need testing. [b] Even pure Sephardic Jews need testing for there are a number of genetic diseases they may be carriers of.  Screening for Cystic Fibrosis and Spinal Muscular Atrophy are recommended for persons of all backgrounds. They are included in both the Ashkenazi and Sephardic and Mizrachi disease lists.

For a more comprehensive list of genetic diseases based on one’s background, see:

http://www.jewishgeneticdiseases.org/jewish-genetic-diseases/

https://www.jewishgenetics.org/dor-yeshorim